Prisoner
Much thanks and love to Heather Staggers, TopSpin, and Shy Guy for making this song as powerful as it became.
I've played this over in my mind so many times, my finger of imagination's worn pressing rewind,
I'm staring at you face to face behind prison bars, heart hardened by emotional scars,
You broke my spirit, and since you're finally captured, I'ma tell you how my life has been fractured,
You know what, I won't do it, won't give you the satisfaction
Ya boy had to go through it, but God, He makes me happy.
You never got away with it, His eyes see all, darkness is like light to Him and He saw you, appalled.
As you repeatedly molested, raped, de-masculated a young boy barely able to discern the situation.
But this boy is all grown up, and much wiser, and looking at my future in Christ, it's much brighter.
He pulled me out the chaos that you helped to create, and helped me see that I was not a disgrace.
(Hook)
Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord of hosts, so I boast in His majesty and the faith that it stokes.
I represent the antithesis of the life that you broke, One who walks in His purposes while I rest in His hope.
But you don't know me, the kid you know was helpless, scared,
Full of tears, full of pain, full of fear, and you dared,
To cloak yourself with the night, and have your way with the boy,
And after so many years I recognize this as cowardice.
I still wear callouses, in body and in spirit, when a door hinge creeks, I look around for your appearance.
Before long, all that fear that I had, grew into anger,
Keeping friends at arm's length and mean muggin any strangers.
But Christ, He put a smile on my face, and gave me love,
Not from behind, but the kind that only comes from above.
The Creator of the universe saw my worth, and I'm praying that you get what you deserve.
(Hook)
The Creator of the universe saw my worth, but I had no intrinsic value, just pain and hurt.
I felt it and I dealt it, like a blackjack dealer,
So what inside of me, made God decide I was a keeper?
Of course I know the answer to that, it wasn't me,
It was He that mad the move, pursued me, gave mercy.
I knew that I didn't want to be much like you, but when god showed me the standard, I was just like you.
In the sense that I was doing my dirt, people got hurt, I could never buy redemption no matter how hard I work.
You're the one in jail, but I'm the prisoner of bitterness, a captive of my anger, a slave to my resentment.
And if you want to know real love, Christ's is endless, He's ready to respond to a heart full of repentence.
And in order to be free of the pain, I've got to end this, and offer unconditional love, and my forgiveness.
(Hook 2)